A dry lily-petal

Water was everywhere

Root-shoot

Where not?

Didn’t it nurture ?

Gave life

Gave Blood

Gave meaning

But then

Why’s the petal dry?

Arms of leaves stretched…..

Eyes of blossoms sparkling…

The love that’s swarming within..

Why doesn’t it come out and soak everything for good?

Why’s love failing me?

Cheers to the new beginning!

Cheers to the new beginning

Cheers to the new beginning

Happy new year 2065..oops! 2066

Cheers to the new beginning!

But

Sometimes beginnings ain’t so simple

and sometimes goodbye’s the only way….

Goodbye 2065

take all the jealosy and selfishness and meanness with you

take away the fatigues,the lethargies,the scarcity

sweep away the hatred…..

welcome 2066

Bring the harmony,the integration, the peace of mind,

the little happiness that’s on my part

Let me wake up everymorning in your arms

with the tinglish hangover of the love

that reigns all night all over

Let life remain the same, crispy,wispy,syrupy

steal my loquacity,lemmi steal your reticence

Lets coincide

Let’s come together………!as 2066 steals in secretly

सपना हो यो भनेदेखी….

सपना हो यो भनेदेखी
सपनीमै मरुँ
अर्को जन्म पाएँ भने
तिमीसँगै परुँ

एउटा जून आकाशमा एउटा मेरो काख
जिन्दगीको पुग्यो धोको दैव दियौ लाख
हाम्रो माया चोखो भए यसको लाज राख
यसको लाज राख

जता हेर्छु उतै तिमी मेरो वरिपरी
निदरीमा झझल्कोले उठ्छु घरिघरी
तिमी बिना आखाँ मेरो साउनको झरी
साउनको झरी

जिवन मेरो के पो होला बिना तिम्रो माया
 तिमी  जान्छौ जतातिर उतै लाग्छु छायाँ
एकै मन एकै मुटु दुई हाम्रो काया
दुई हाम्रो काया

तिम्रो बेला मनमा बज्छ नरेटेरै पनि
टाढै देख्दा प्यास मर्छ नभेटेरै पनि
सपना हो यो भनेदेखी
सपनीमै मरुँ
अर्को जन्म पाएँ भने
तिमीसँगै परुँ

सपना हो यो भनेदेखी….

You Never Knew

You never knew

that after you left I stayed

by the impression on the ground where you’d lain

I drew my hand

over the flattened grass and it was

as if I needed and cherished your absence more

than I needed and cherished you

                                    -

(an extract from the poem SUSPENDED by Bruno K.Oijer from The Lost Words,translated from Swedish by Tom Geddes)

Roller-coaster

Life’s a roller-coaster.I am mothering my mother.feels strange.

When I wake up, I feel good carresing her sleeping beside me.Then hot water,light breakfast,medicine,and what wud she like for brunch!!A Big No No to Bhaat!!what then? Chapati/Pudding/Porridge?Makaiko Bhaat?…I m so worried,till she eats well, like a mother worries for her child abstaining food.Then tending her at Sunbeam,hourly glass of water, milk, soup ..medicine..sometimes this sometimes that…sometimes she disobeys,sometimes she cries,sometimes she unfolds old stories…..and I am all here, all in charge of her…Just thinking,this might have been the exact way she had mothered me.But the difference being that,I must have been too demanding,ununderstanding,but she has always been demure and docile………………………………….

So..just thinking..what a roller coaster,this life is… 

source:  www.clipartheaven.com

Nightmares again:with IOL

IOL aftermaths. Last night I dreamt of cycling down the mountain lanes through a sheer madness of mountain under the creeping darkness and thuds and pats of incessant rain. I was letting myself winding down like Sai, tears flowing, towards an unknown landscape of darkness. And by the time I reached the bottom of the mountain, I was surrounded by a mass of rioters and they robbed me like Biju from USA, Yamricka, Amricka.Panick-striken, I sought a shelter in a small,dark,dingy hot like that of the Cook’s. And the grins and grimace, twists and twirls in the Judge’s face, while he was shoving Nimi’s face down the toilet seat kept on gnawing my mind, nibbling as if electrocuting. And I cursed Gyan with the surging wrath and scorn, the fine dough of MOMO’s skin was squeezing the   coy mutton keema inside hard, such a cruel toss of fate, prejudice, and humiliation. And I felt like baffled in the ragged-jute-bag and stolen away like Mutt, never to come back. Oh Yamricka Amricka, the golden land, the land of hot dogs and dry martini, now having abandoned thy…Where am I to head? With all but the inheritance of defeat, humiliation and submission!!

IOL

IOL

But someone has said, “Follow your heart”. That’s what I am doing. Sai, yes…Let’s run away together…

 

 

Just praying for the better days to come….

Soooo…………

nothing’s coming to mind. Cold’s eating my head out. Mum does not eat much.Couldn’t finish the task I was suppposed to do. Couldnt go to the college tour. PPl are angry with me.Blog’s angry with me.My word’s are angry with me.

Waiting for the EOU.Hope thr will be sm sort of cleansing and new begining.

All I am doing is praying .